Running out of Steam - Pt 2

[mrtwopointfour]

Think of the most patient you've ever been in your life. That is about 1/100th of the kind of patience you're going to need in the coming months.

I think we better make this 1/1000th - I've never been a patient person, always have to have what I want straight away. I'm a buy something on credit rather than save up for it kind of person. I think this is something I need to work on a lot over the coming weeks.

You are right of course, its not been long and many people on here have waited years for anything to start to turn around, I'm not sure if its more the fact that W is constantly reminding me about D (or the outcome of it), rather than me just knowing that its still what she wants. So working on my validation skills and detachment will help me there, as I can then not take it so personally and not let it knock me off my feet every time she mentions something.

It'll make you feel better about yourself and it'll get her attention too.

I have done some of these things, and W has noticed - some times in the form of joking about having a makeover, and others by saying 'you look nice'. Again, I'm over thinking here as only 3 months or so ago, she would make a comment such as 'oooo, you look very nice - I like you in that!' (in a flirty way) - isn't it hard to accept how W can go from loving and being attracted to you to not at all in so little time! I guess that's what a series of long term minor issues in a R and interest from and towards a OM can do!

Not detached: W happy, you're happy. W angry, you're angry. W sad, you're sad.

Detached: W happy, you're happy. W angry, you're happy. W sad, you're happy.

This is great advice and will put this with my daily notes that i read. One thing I am trying to work out about detachment is: when is it detachment and when is it blanking stuff out of your mind. For instance I have managed to 80% of the time forget W has told me she is in love with somebody else. But I am not sure this is through detachment or simply not wanting to think about it so pushing it to one side.