Mana, Mana! Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo! Part 2

[Tallula]

Hope everyone had a great Easter! My kids were stuffed full of candy, that's for sure.

So, while getting ready for church, H walked in my bathroom and asked what was up. With tears in my eyes I told him that I feel done. He got really upset. Like sad upset. He said that he could feel that from me, that he has watched me pull away, but since saturday morning felt scared that I was done. I had already made a decision not to tell him what I know until I speak to my IC. I also wasn't going to tell him that I am ready to divorce, but this conversation felt right. I said that I will not be able to have him live with us after his lease is up and when the baby gets here. That living with someone I love who is sleeping with another woman is too painful and I need to move on.

Then I told him that I'm now talking to my best friend, not my husband. I told him that I am very worried about him. I've seen a huge change in him. That our children deserve a happy father, not a miserable or dead one. I told him I think he that he should be alone. Not with me or OW and that I don't think she is the only OW and that you will do the same things to her. That this R is going to be a big challenge. It's gotten around to our friends & family. People don't accept their R. They are angry. That I don't want to be in the same room as her, much less have her within 100 feet of my children. Obviously I will do what is best for my children, but this will be a huge challenge for me. I told him no more family time for now, I need space. I need time.

I discussed our next step of fixing up the house and looking into selling it. We can't afford 2 places, so he needs to really look at where he will live. If it's a roomate situation, we can do where I stay with my parents when he has the kids.

I feel tremendous relief in the conversation. But...H somehow has taken this as he now might be ready to end it with OW and commit to us. I just let that go, didn't respond. I get it. When he told me he wanted to D, I couldn't accept it. So, I didn't feel the need to push. I see IC tonight and will discuss with her how to proceed. If I tell him I know what is really going on, and that I'm done. I might do it in a counciling appointment.

I will say, I am laughing at OW. She is getting played to the nines!! Oh, yes, you are so fabulous. He is leaving me for you... There is also a part of me that feels sorry for her. But, she started this knowing what kind of man he was. I started it thinking he was a faithful person. Good luck, honey.