Have you observed any changes in her? What about your 180's?
My wife seems to be slooooowly getting more comfortable around me. More eye contact, more at ease, slightly more willingness to open up or do stuff together. Progress is very slow, so it's hard for me to tell for sure. Plus, there's always a step back here and there.
My 180's have been ongoing and steady, nothing new... just kinda fine tuning as we go. Most people have been advising me to stay the course. Did you have something in mind?
Originally Posted By: Mtnman
My W issue is solely the mother (sort of). My FIL had problems with alcohol when W was a teen. He was the primary nurturer in the family. So he's no longer in that role and MIL was her normal, me first, bitter self. W was/is not loved unconditionally by her mother. That has to hurt. W was never smart enough, pretty enough, etc.
While I think it's smart to be aware of these things, I don't think it's good to focus to much on them because we can't fix them. Our wives have to work through these issues for themselves. Besides, getting too hung up on these issues (which we can't control or "fix") prevents us from improving ourselves, and becoming better spouses.
In other news, my youngest sister, (W's BF) moved back into her H's home this weekend, after being in her own place for a year. Good news, I thought.
Wife, who's been coaching sis to make it on her own, seemed disappointed... said she's only doing it because of finances. When I talked with sis she sounded much more positive about it. When I asked her how things were going with hubby, she smiled and said "We're working on it."
I'm sure W knows way more about the details than I do. Lil' sis and I get along great but we don't talk much about her marriage issues.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
