GTO, I haven't read your old thread, just this one, so I apologize in advance if I'm off-base.
The gist of what I got from this thread is that you are very emotional, with continued breakdowns, and H enjoys talking to OW.
How did you behave when you were first dating? What did he like about you? Where did the happy, fun GTO go?
What are the things you are trying to work on? What are your 180s?
What is OW giving H that you are not?
With regards to the IC, I realize that's not what you wanted to hear, and I think I would have been peeved too, but perhaps the IC is really focused on what is best for the children. If they are really struggling with "limbo," maybe some clearer boundaries/routines are in order.
