I left the kids this morning to be picked up by their dad, and I'm working in front of a picture window in my home-away-from-home.
I was feeling really stressed out about things in general, had a frustrating day at work, worried about whether this trip was going to be painful or awkward for me, revved up because of the chores that needed doing before we left, and the usual feeling of being pulled in different directions with kids home for spring break while workload isn't taking a break. So I got a manicure/pedicure and tried to convince myself that whether I felt stressed out or not, exactly the same plot was going to play out. It was my choice to make myself crazy over it or not. That helped a little.
I also noticed that after I called H and told him I was driving separately and not sleeping at the hotel, I felt pretty good about it. It didn't turn out to be difficult to say, and it felt good to be taking care of myself by owning my needs.
On the drive down I listened to Pia Mellody's boundaries CDs again.
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
