Ok, so what about a list of YOUR positive changes. I think you've been soooo focused on him that you've neglected your own happiness. Look, bottom line is that M is hard. You made a vow to stay for better or worse. If you want to leave, there's nothing stopping you from doing that. But if your M is saved the right way, you will be happy again.

So what about YOUR changes?

M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER