Be civilized with STBX

[mstoadswildride]

The house is slowly getting ready for the market. I feel sad and yet ready to move on with my life. Divorce should be finalized this week. Waiting to hear from my lawyer.

STBX has been at the house, painting, repairing and moving items to his storage. I'm doing as little as possible since he is the one that wants the house sold. I gotta find a place for my girls and I.

D17s room is beautiful. She put photos, insightful quotes, Christmas lights, amazing drawings on her wall. STBX took one look at it started crying and saying to D17 how sorry he was that we had to move. A week later, he primed the walls and painted over it. I just made sure that HE was the one to paint the wall and not I.

The whole house is in a preparation upheaval. Symbolic like the way his life is.

Trying to stay cheerful, respectful when interacting with him, dressing stylish, not offering any info of my whereabouts, short conversations,going out with friends, took up kickboxing, complimented him when I truly meant it.

Last week, my friends informed me that he changed his relationship status on FB to "it's complicated"

He is still calling me his wife and "we" can do this or "we" can that. He tried to hug me too.

I had to set some boundaries. I said, "I am not ready for a hug" and there was no "wife" and there is no "we". He looked like a hurt, sad little child. He just looked awkward.

His response:"Acknowledged, I just thought it would be easier this way."

He wasn't invited to D15 Birthday party on Saturday. He ended staying and helping prepare dinner for birthday party. He stayed a little while and took off in his U-Haul Truck.

Sunday, I went to church and did some Birthday shopping for D15. He kept painting. My girls and I were hanging downstairs in the kitchen being goofy, acting silly while preparing dinner. D15 said her friends loved last night's dinner. I responded that it was dad that prepared it not me. Then she looked at her dad and said, "You did a great job dad!! My friends loved the dinner you prepared." Classy little girl

Before he left last night, he said to me, "You are a great mom." I said thank you. Trying to show my girls that even though dad f-uped, I can still demonstrate some respect and paving a road for the girls to have an on going relationship with their dad.