My H is gone too - for his weekly gambling. He tried to start in on me about a housework project today and I calmly told him I wouldn't have time but thought it would be great if he wanted to stay home and do the work himself
I see, and could be wrong, you still "reacting" to your H.
Remember this is now the TnD show. (By the way, you may want to consider renaming yourself. How about Terrific and Desirable? Tantalizing and Delicious?) Anyway, as its your show, you get to set the tone. If your H is spewing, CALMLY ask him to stop. If he won't stop then remove yourself (and the kids if necessary) ASAP. Go to a different room, go for a drive, whatever. But ALL communications from you need to be calm - and this is easier with detachment.
Have you been able to read any of the DB books yet? Have you read Cadet's links?
Hoping you find some peace ~ MizJ
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
