If you are having or thinking about having intimacy w/your h, please use protection. Have you been checked out by your physician? You can't be too cautious when the spouses are on the lose out in the world.
Some mlcers will want to have "sex" w/their spouses and others will avoid it like the plaque. I would suggest that you follow his lead because if you were to initiate it, it must might scare him even further into the tunnel. Keep in mind, mlcers do not look at "making love" the same way that a normal person would in a relationship. Right now it's just sex, no emotions attached to it.
Also, please keep to one thread so that we can follow you and your situation. It also helps if you are trying to maintain a "log" on the forum.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
