Spartan, sorry you're going through this. Let me point out a few things: 1. The fact that you're not letting your W's actions paralyze you anymore is HUGE. You're leaving that dark place where no one wants to be. 2. You said, " I don't know if she's consciously trying to hurt anyone and I'm trying to believe she isn't; the fact of the matter is she is hurting people and I need to protect myself and my kids." Your W is doing what she thinks is best for her given her perception of the world. Choose to see her as a lost little kid rather than a malicious person. She's behaving as a person who has no idea what life is all about. Let her. It's her own journey. 3. Why 30 more hours? Is this a self-imposed deadline? 4. The D has been filed, correct? I did the same: stuck with my desire to save my M even after my H had filed. I didn't want to see that when he took that step, it was definite. Only a small % of couples change their minds once D has been filed, and a large percentage of those go back to the L a few months later to get D. Sorry. But this is what happens, and even though it's not bad to focus on the small prob of saving your M, you can't have your happiness depend on this. Heck, even if the prob was 90%, you should not let the outcome of this determine your happiness. Best to you. Keep being an awesome dad.
