I am sorry you have to go through this. It really is awful. And, yes, I agree with you that:
//anything I've ever done to him compares to the all the pain he has caused.//
I do, however, see some of my feelings toward my W in your story. I don't think:
//it was impossible for me to break free to do so//
is true. It was possible. We all make choices in life and give things a priority in our life. The bottom line is that you gave everything you listed a higher priority than your husband. Do I give my kids a bath or spend time with my H? Do I work another shift or go out with my H? I have spent an entire marriage at the bottom of my wife's priority list. It is incredibly hurtful and damaging to a H's self esteem.
After years of my W treating me like this, I developed a bad attitude and my W walked away. Maybe your H just got tired of being at the bottom of the list. Just something to consider.
