Honestly, I never thought he'd figure anything out in 4 months. It was for me so I didn't have to be around the crazy each day.
Wish I had done this myself - almost daily it felt like I was going to be fitted for the self-hugging jacket if I didn't get away. Since we still live in the same house, GAling and other activities probably saved me.
Originally Posted By: Tallula
I'd be ok with him living at home if he'd end it with the OW...cause it's just prolonging his work. Which will be years in the making and I don't know if I'm even willing to stay for it. But I'm not 100% that I'm not.
That's a conundrum alright. I fought those feelings from late October to the beginning or March - I know exactly how you feel. At least your H has acknowledged (if even on a superficial level) that he has demons to fight, so I guess that might offer you at least some hope.
Originally Posted By: Tallula
I also think, when you came from being an alcoholic 23 year old living in your car, with no one speaking to you, 20k in debt & no job...this doesn't have the potential to be the deepest hole I've dug myself out of.
Yeah, but, now you're trying to do it with three children. Don't get me wrong - I FULLY believe you are strong and capable enough to do so. With the family help and your strength, I know you will!
Originally Posted By: Tallula
I have no doubt he misses us. I know that he does see I'm pulling away, and the pursuit is to keep me as an option. I also have no doubt that he is incapable of rational thought at this stage. I think that is why I hesitate to even bring it up just yet. He is crazy enough. There are plenty of people he could stay with if he had to and he could get a second job. I just think this would add pressure to someone who is clearly at the end of his rope. This stuff with OW & OWH, is NOT my H when he is healthy. I haven't seen this in over 10 years, and honestly...it's worse.
