Yesterday, when I came home, my wife was already home and seemed sad and depressed. I was in a good mood (PMA) and started making pizza for dinner, having bought all the ingredients on the way home. The pizza was cooked and ready, and I was in bedroom reading something, and my wife came in and took my hand and lead me to the bed to lie on it and hug each other.
After lying there a few minutes tears started to come out of her eyes. I asked her "what's wrong?" and she was hesitant, I didn't push her, but she finally started to talk. She said she was lonely and had no real friends. We have moved here 18-months ago and she still didn't have friends and she was pathetic.
I listened, validated what she said, and I avoided trying to "fix" her problems.
To me, her sharing her feelings/emotions with me like this is a positive step since she feels safe talking to me.
On the other hand, I know I still have a long journey in front of me. The next day was her B-day, and she told me that she hoped our 3 girls and me didn't plan anything because she is going out with her friend (a 31-year old single alcoholic). I told her she had to tell the girls that she wouldn't be here.
So here she is telling me she is depressed because she doesn't have any good friends that she can confide in, yet on her B-day she will be going out with this "friend" who she doesn't share anything with and go to bars drinking, acting like she is single.
It is not something that I can understand. I think I'll know our situation is really improved when she is willing to spend time with family instead.
