Not confused anymore...just anxious and emotional

[BRNR]

Can I make a suggestion? If you're "done" then is it going to hurt to wait a month before telling him?

I thought I did say I wasn't going to do anything until I let these feelings sink in for a while...if I didn't I meant to...

I'm sorry to hear about the estranged father scenario and happy at the same time. For all I know, your mom did cheat on him. What's that got to do with your relationship? Or is that why you haven't talked to him in so many years?

My thoughts exactly, what does one have to do with another. Did she? I don't know. The reason I have not talked to him is because he disappeared. He is now "blaming" my mother for this, but when he left all those years ago he went to Florida...while we were in New Jersey... He reached out once again about twelve years ago, then vanished again.