I think the thing you are missing bblake, is the "indifference" part that Grizz is trying to point out. If she was done, gone, forgotten about me and moved on, she would be indifferent. She isn't, at least not yet. There is "something" still there, good, bad or otherwise. That is the only point I was trying to make. I wasn't mind reading.
No, I don't think I'm missing anything in the posts. Any effort to try to place rational thought with the actions of a WAS/MLCer is MIND READING - or at least wishful thinking. My W was never indifferent, and from what I've read yours isn't either - but both have said they were done and there's no chance to R - the love is gone. Yet both seem to respond to their environment and have shown ebbs & flows with the R.
Regardless of what what they try to tell you, there IS something underneath driving their behavior - and in most cases they may not even know what it is. And really, if you spend a lot of time trying to decipher their actions and ascribe meaning and rational thought to those actions, you may well be wasting time. That's why it's so important to work on yourself and not pay so much attention to what your W is doing or saying. I know it's not easy - a bunch of us here are living it right now...
Maybe your sitch is a one in a million and I hope for your sake it is. But I doubt that's the case as the odds are not in your favor.
Originally Posted By: suckerpunch
I have a phone coaching session tonight. I will journal what Chuck has to say about my sitch. I hope there is something he picks up on from the past month or so...
