I agree Val with your point about us forgetting that the WAS is going through their own emotions too. I really try to remember that when I think about what H could feel regarding his long absences from the kids.
I remain focusing on keeping out of his way while I GAL. I do find it a challenge to create a balance between getting out of his way and maintaining an open channel with the children.
Thank you Val once again. Will keep my head high.
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Little, yes I agree not making anything out of it. Just want to continue on my path the best I can, even if there are some dips, as long as I continue forward. It's like making our way through the jungle.
Tori your comment on self-respect got me thinking. I see your point - hadn't thought about it like that before. Thank you x
I recently re read the phrase about using our anger as a shield not a sword. It finally hit me about what it really means with regards to our behaviours and words towards our WAS (and I suppose any R in general that may bring us to anger at times). Not to lash out, not hurt others intentionally...
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
Hi inside and NLW thank you for coming by. Let's all hang out on the blanket for awhile? Given the recent postings on the board, it is definitely the best place to be. Love you all.
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
yes lets all hang out together and forget about that silly castle. i am so so proud of all of us, that we are choosing to grow and open instead of getting bitter and closing down. the blanket sisters continue (and some very supportive blanket bros) to get me through the tough times and make me smile
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
yes lets all hang out together and forget about that silly castle. i am so so proud of all of us, that we are choosing to grow and open instead of getting bitter and closing down. the blanket sisters continue (and some very supportive blanket bros) to get me through the tough times and make me smile
I was thinking this the other day as well. We have made the choice to move forward without bitterness and to let go of fear. I realize we are works in progress most of the time, but I feel a sense of pride as well, as the "family" on here takes steps everyday.
Sure there are days when we don't do so well, but that's what family is for...to listen without judgement, offer a hug, some advice and occasionally a 2x4.
I would not be in this place without you all. ((((busting)))). Your growth has been remarkable
I just don't see any reason to have realistic hope anymore. Do I want it? Yes. Yet when I take a step back the reality is clear - h does not want me and had devoted himself to another woman. He does not see any of this as a big deal... Even being away from the kids all the time. He wants to keep going and not look back.
I have grasped to tiny threadlike signs of change to keep me going. The truth is I am changing but my sitch is not. My H is convinced I am the one that hasn't moved on and is holding things back. I hear his words and I look at his actions... I look at the past two plus years. The only time he changed his tune was when he was broken up with OW.
I have never been as challenged as I feel right now to let someone go out of love.
We can do this. And I know I couldn't do it without you all xxx
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
I back on the blanket!! I took a few steps towards the castle, but I'm back
M: 9 yrs T: 13 yrs H:34 Me:35, S4, D2, S 7 months Dday 11/12-PA & multiple PAs Dbing 12/12 S 1/13 7/13 H moved back in basement. 8/13 #3 born 10/13 still cheating 10/13 He moves across country, I file for D
