So close I can taste it...

[AnotherStander]

And I feel like GALing! I realky do, for the first time. I want to have some fun!

I've said this to you before, but you really need to quit putting this off and just do it. Most of us had to drag ourselves out of the house kicking and screaming for a while to GAL. The LBS doesn't want to GAL, but once you start it you'll feel better and better about it and about yourself.

I mean you stessed that this line was VERY offensive to you although it was taken for an obviously satirical/comedy/fun post....bu it was still offensive to you. Are you always this high strung? How can that offend you VERY much...

No need to launch personal attacks on those trying to help you.

In fact, I so dont care, that she seems to really be responding to it. Confidence is key. I know you are akl reading this and saying duh we have been telling him that the whole time. I know I havent listened, but I also know you have all been there before. You appreciate the difficulty in letting go of something yiu cannot control.

I often see you post this "I finally get it" attitude, followed by more of the same behavior within days or even hours. Case in point:

Wife starts tearing up a little, and says 'oh that must be so hard'. No sh$t !

No need to see it on TV baby, just look at me and remembef that day you smashed my dream of a perfect family.

Same old blaming and bitterness. Would have been a great time to ask her what she's feeling and do some validation of her feelings. That would have been a significant 180.

I watchex casually then went outside to smoke and left my w sitting there watching all of the drama unfold. When I came back in it looked like she was deep in thought. Maybe that got through to her a little?

How many times do you need to be told to quit the mind-reading? Seriously, are you going to change or just keep doing the same old stuff over and over again expecting different results?

My wife has never read any of this, yet she executes it perfectly right out of the text book! Its weird how they all do that isnt it? Freaky.

Sure it's script, but that does not excuse you from addressing your faults and doing 180's on them.

I was also announcing everything I saw to my wife on purpose to see what she would say about if I could finish it.

When are you going to drop your expectations? Can you not build a swingset FOR YOUR D with ZERO expectations of what it means to your W?

so 25 I total see the benefit of GALing. I watched some youtube videos made by many other marriage counselors about WAS situations and ALL of them said that becoming mors interesting through your own activities was crucial to getting a WAS to look back.

GAL isn't a trick to lure the WAS back. It's for YOU. Work on YOU, become the strong, independent man you once were. Get to the point where you realize you will be fine whether with or without her. THAT is what it's all about, that is when she may be attracted back to you.

I am not easily offended and dedonitely not from a comment on this forum.

I think there's some denial here, it's clear that you are easily offended by comments on this forum.

My wife comes from a broken home, and I think there are unresolved issues. I will throw this out there, and please everyone, dont het offended. But I feel it kay be more common for the WAS to be from a divorcee family, and the LBS not.

Quit looking for reasons, explanations and justifications for your sitch.

SM, you've been here over 3 months and every time I see some little ray of hope that you might FINALLY be grasping DB'ing, you follow it up with piles of the "more of the same" behavior that I suspect landed you here in the first place. Remember what Michele says in DR, if you stick a different name on old behavior then it is not something new and different, it is still MORE OF THE SAME. If you want to save your M then you need to quit pinning your hopes on some sudden epiphany on your W's part that she's screwing up by leaving the already-perfect H and make REAL AND LASTING CHANGES to yourself. Good luck.