Need to let go

[littleGTO]

Agree w labug, Floyd. NOt detachment.

Thanks, 2, Tallula, Floyd, PoN, FY,bustin and SP,
I appreciate all of your feedback!

One thing I do know--the less I interact w H, the better I am. I don't think about him as much or what he's thinking. I rarely think about what he's doing any more.

I put far more energy into wondering what's going on in his head when we've had conversations or interacted at all. I am really not trying to mind-read.

Our "21" years of being together (although we aren't technically together any more) is coming up at the beginning of April. This morning I had crazy thoughts about emailing him & his entire staff at work (including OW) saying, "21 years. I love you still. But... Song dedication- Just Give Me a Reason by Pink. Your wife, turtle.

I know it sounds crazy and I have to dig deep as to my intentions with this. I wonder if I'm not at a point of After the LRT. Give one last expression of love and then push away. Don't really know if I'm there, but I certainly feel like there isn't much left.

And I'm not sure WHY I would want to send it to all his co-workers except that I want HER to hear how much I love my H. I want any co-workers that know me to realize when this goes down that it wasn't ME who wanted this. And, that OW is a demon.

Okay, now that I've got that off my chest, can anyone give me advice about what the heck I'm thinking! I know 2x4s are coming, so give them to me, if needed. PoN, don't be too harsh--I don't think I'd really actually do this.