Today is 2 years to the day my H moved out. It also would have been my mom's 87th birthday, that's why I'm so clear on the date.

When I found these boards in July-Aug of that year, I never expected I would become a poster (I lurked for awhile), certainly not a regular poster and most definitely wouldn't still be here in March of 2013.

But here I am.

One thing I've learned is not to look into the future and try to predict what's coming.

What else have I learned here?

[list]
[*]I'm not always right
[*}slow down and think
[*]listen twice, talk once
[*]patience
[*]stay out of useless power squabbles on internet message boards
[*]I can only change me

I've also made some great friends, people who have supported me when I needed it and given me a 2x4 when I needed it.

I'm still married, and see my H occasionally. We get along as co-parents and he would do just about anything I might ask of him, except work on the marriage.

And I understand why.

Fear is a powerful motivator.

I have a great life that's better than it's ever been because of the work I've done here, with my IC and all the books I've read.

Someday I may want to share life with someone but right now I'm enjoying just being me. I'm not in limbo, just living my life.

My sons are a gift and have taught me a lot about myself. I couldn't be happier about the R we've built over the last 2 years. We've all 3 grown-up a lot.

As many have said, I wouldn't have chosen this journey but I'm happy for what its given me.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss