The ups and downs of DBing

[Wendylon]

Thank you so much, Rkyfat, for your honest feedback. Lots to think about.

I'm sure you're right that I'm negative about H and miss opportunities to make H feel good about himself and that I'm still expecting him to step up to the plate in ways that are counterproductive. It's so useful to have you point it out. It's harder for me to see what I'm doing from within but I see it when you say it. I don't think I'm as negative with him as I am about him here but I'm sure I don't capitalise on the situations you mentioned to help him feel better about himself. About the charity bike ride, for example, I'm encouraging but low-key (partly because I don't think it will happen).

As for breaks for me, I honestly don't feel that I need anything more than I'm getting. I love cycling to my regular cafe and having a chilli hot chocolates on a daily basis. It's my social time too. I either end up talking with friends that are also regulars there or friends and family know that it's a good place to meet me in the afternoon. For example, my mother met me there at 2 today and then a friend who I know through the cafe joined us and then my mother left and she and I had some time alone. Funnily enough, the new therapist/tutor/carer (who I also met there) was serving us as that is still his B job.

Thank you again for taking the time to respond.