In speaking your truth, you begin to take back your power and heal. I'm sending you strength. ((((()))))
Thank you SD, If your ever in TN let me know I'd love to buy you a cup of coffee.
Bug and Ruby, thanks for your support I know I can always count on you.
Funny thing is I put this memory off as a dream or a fantasy. Thats how I dealt with it. This put ideas into my head about who I was. if i dreamed or fantasized about it I must be a bad person. I acted and reacted to a lot of things based on this "fantasy". I tried to prove to myself I was good, always living with the "fantasy" of what happened instead of realizing it did happen and I am not the guilty person. Man have I got some stuff to iron out with my IC lol.
I'm thinking about not telling my wife about this until she is ready to hear it with out feeling sorry for me. I don't want sorry for me. I want my wife to understand my pain and walk with me through it not feel guilty and come back for ANY wrong reasons.
You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.
This reminds me of what MWD says, to reevaluate your sitch. What are you doing that's making her reconsider reconciling? Figure it out! Cuz it's working.
I've thought about this alot and I obviously am working on me but, we have very little contact. When we do speak I am usually calm and have not given her much crap about her decision. I also ask her if she needs anything and I am here if she ever needs to talk. I think the biggest thing is given her space, all the space she needs. This space may even include a divorce, I am prepared for any eventuality.
I am really itching to purchase a motorcycle, I have been cruising the Harley web sites looking and day dreaming. Just another month or two and I'll have enough money for one. Yes I'm going to purchase a gently used one and a cheaper model. I do not want to have buyers remorse later and make a financially bad decision. it is after all my first motorcycle.
You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.
Yes I'm going to purchase a gently used one and a cheaper model. I do not want to have buyers remorse later and make a financially bad decision. it is after all my first motorcycle.
If you're buying a Harley then the good news is the resale on them is crazy. You'll take little if any loss on it whether you sell it in months or years. The models change very little from year-to-year, so the resale remains pretty high unless the bike has a lot of mileage or isn't kept in nice shape. There are some exceptions, like on the Big Twins when they changed from the 5 speed in 2006 to the 6 speed in 2007. It was such a big change that it did hurt the resale of the 06 and earlier models a bit. But it's pretty uncommon for them to make big model changes like that.
If you're buying a Harley then the good news is the resale on them is crazy. You'll take little if any loss on it whether you sell it in months or years.
Sweet, of course that means I can't "steal" one lol.
I guess we are back to N/C, I text me wife the other day about taxes and said I hope your week is going well, No response. Since she moved out she does not call/reach out, so I respect her decision. I did not expect a response from the text, just an observation.
On my weeks that I have d14, I take her to school (My boss allows me to come in 30 min late, I just stay 30 min later in the day). I have to say I love the time with my little girl. For some reason in the car she talks more than any other time. I would not give up my time with her for anything.
Hhmm another blessing I did not expect.
You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.
I realize that I am not God and cannot control the actions of other people. I can only control my actions. I can control my thoughts, whether I choose to think positive thoughts or negative thoughts.
Proverbs 23:7 For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.
This is something I am working on, realizing that my thoughts lead my action which will lead my heart. I have control over my mind and my actions and my heart, this does not happen by magic. I choose to be happy, positive, productive, and a Godly man. I choose to forgive, love and be kind to others. This is such a simple idea yet profoundly difficult to fully realize.
How do I achieve this goal? For me it's about getting out of the way and letting God lead me. It's about praying, meditating and reading the Bible. It's about realizing I have only one life to live, this is it and it's time to start living like the person I want to be, regardless of how others behave around me.
My wife contacted me today to say that we are going to owe 2,700 in taxes as she did not have enough taken out for her business. I did not get upset, it is what it is. I could probably tell her that it is her debt and good luck with it, however I am not going to do that. I was pleasant and thanked her for calling me. I am choosing to Love in the way that I see fit. I am sure she is freaking out about the amount and if I can ease her a bit by paying it I will. This will delay my motorcycle by a bit but... oh well. This is not going to be a pattern as this debt was incurred whiled she lived with me, anything from this time on is her puppy to deal with.
You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.
