From what you wrote, can we assume you were present in the therapy sessions in which she praised your existence? Pardon the sarcasm, but, that's exactly how your post reads. Read between the lines - my W has made a similar comment about me, but, she still has her reasons for wanting out of the M - whether she truly realizes what those are or not - and that's a battle the WAS/MLCer has to fight on their own. No amount of input/help/controlling behavior from the LBS will make the process occur any faster.
^^^^Exactly. It is not possible to make sense out of the thoughts of a WAS. Even the WAS doesn't understand a lot of their own thoughts and actions. They can call you the greatest spouse and parent ever and STILL want out of the M.
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Plus I think the arrogance of saying we did everything soooo well in the M prevents us from seeing our problems and doing something about them.
^^^^I totally agree with this too, and I can recognize it when I see it because that was me. I think SM is about as extreme an example as I've seen of it on these forums, but most of us have had at least a little bit of that "I don't understand why this is happening because I was a good H and father" attitude. It is important to drop the ego so we can take a good, hard look at ourselves and really start the difficult work it takes to make ourselves attractive again and into a better spouse and person.
