I would sit tight and do nothing at this time. Keep your expectations at zero at ALL times.
If you want a divorce, then by all means ask him about it. However, if you want to try to save your marriage, then say nothing about it. Limbo is a tough place to be especially when you have a contact w/the spouse quite often. The best thing you could do is probably not be so readily available to him. In other words, when he calls, let it go to voice mail once in a while and return the call at a later time. Find things to do to keep your mind busy and focused on that partiuclar activity. It's okay to do family things together once in a while, but he needs to spend time w/the children on his own so that he gets to see what it's going to take for him to take care of the children on his own, if a divorce takes place, etc.
Mlc is a long hard road for both parties and this is the time for you to learn how to live on your own and for yourself. This is the time that you need to let go and allow God to do his work. Live your life as if he's not going to come back and try to think of your h as the mailman.
Again, expectations have to remain at zero or you will be disappointment and have "downers" if you hear from him all of the time and then he doesn't contact you for a bit. This journey is not called a rollercoaster for nothing...it has highs, lows and plenty of twists and turns.
Keep the focus on you and your children.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
