It's not a matter of 'letting W get to me'. In general, women and men do communicate differently, and learning those differences is very important. Many times, either of us would say something that would set the other off and we didn't even realize what it was. I never would've dreamed that a male and female could read the same sentence and come up with different meanings. That's been the hardest part.
I know for a fact my W hasn't read any of the books. Two have gathered some dust and two others are on loan to some friends whom are having some issues - and they're having great success with them. So even if it is too late for my W and I, maybe someone will benefit from my mistakes.
And yes, she's given me 'permission' to say ITYS three times in the last year - twice very recently. My response is always 'I wouldn't like it being said to me, so I'm not going to do that to anyone else' and I continue listening to what she has to say. Might not be the most eloquent response, but, it's the best I;ve come up with on my own...
