shelly, I agree that 180's by themselves wouldn't "end an affair", but throwing her out of the house isn't going to solve their problems either. it would just make the problems worse and harder to solve.
from other things that MJ's wife has said, which I quoted in my response above, there are things that he needs to do in changing himself before he can expect his wife to leave OM. this is not just an affair with one predatory OM - she has said clearly that if it were not this one it would be another. this is not just "affair fog" but a cry for help - and he needs to respond if he wants to save his marriage.
he needs to find out if she has *legitimate* gripes (not just "rewriting history" but things that he really does need to do better) and he needs to address them.
