I've never been a gambler, so the idea of putting my life on hold for, say a 5% chance of reconciliation just seems like a waste of what little time I have left on earth. I'd rather get busy living my new life.
If we're doing it right, our life is not on hold, and we are busy living our new life. Enjoying our life does not require anything from another person.
Originally Posted By: turtlegirl
I just have never been here. What do you do to move on from a 20-year relationship? When you share 3 growing boys to co-parent. When there is an OW in the picture. When H is not the person I've known all these years. I just don't know.
This is the biggest reason to stand, in my opinion. You are aware that most D's happen at the 7-8 year mark, right? All three of us have beat that milestone by far for a reason. Because we had true commitment and learned how to work out our differences. Our M's have already stood the test of time. I figure our long commitments deserve the best that we can give.
Originally Posted By: AS
Should I sacrifice the possibility of finding true love for that?
Personally, I'd wonder more what the odds are of finding "true love". (whatever that means to you) Certainly you'd agree you and your W had it for years. Will your next "true love" relationship last longer than your present 20+ year M? The odds say nope.
Michele tells us to not allow anyone to tell us when it's time to throw in the towel. Also that if and when the time comes we will know.
I'm waiting for my wife's "feelings" to return. Maybe they never will, but starting over with someone else is no sure deal either. In the meantime I plan to move on with my life and be happy about it. Bust On, my friends!
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
