Do you want a divorce? I don't think you do, you've mentioned RetroV. And if not, I would think that this would be a really short conversation rather than an argument.
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She said I should cause she doesn't know how to. I told her to grow up and start learning how to do things on her own.
Sounds like the two of you are just pushing each other's buttons. Try to remember you want to show her 180's, you want to model behavior that is the opposite of what it was in the M. So instead of arguing with her on this and telling her to "grow up" you might have tried something like "I understand you want a D, but that is not what I want, at least not right now. If you wish to pursue it then I can't stop you, but right now I am still in a position of wanting to work on a new relationship with you and as such I am not willing to initiate a divorce." And let that be the end of the conversation.
