I've been pretty delinquent on updates, so here goes. I will try to keep it at an executive summary level. NTX & OLW - I appreciate you guys following up.
My W and I did get together now about a month ago to discuss the terms of our agreement. As to be expected, there was more opportunity to talk. I started off by asking her how she was doing. She gave the standard answer until I asked her again. Not too surprising, but her life hasn't been going particularly well. At that time, she was starting get knocks on the door to get her out of her apartment. She had been sleeping excessively, obviously very depressed.
I also gave her a brochure during our conversation for a Weekend to Remember marriage conference. She actually looked through it to my surprise. She did say she was surprised I would even consider something like this. I just told her the story behind it, I would look at it as potentially a "hail Mary" or something that would help us to be sure. She said it felt like pressure. I just told her I was not intending on applying any pressure and she can do whatever she wishes with the brochure. From my perspective, I was just sending a message that it would be something I would be willing to try. Her reaction exceeded my expectations. I went in thinking there was a 10% chance she would consider it and left thinking it was more like 20%. The local conference have come and gone and she hasn't mentioned anything about it and neither have I.
During our conversation, I did tell her our two previous conversations were very hard, but in my opinion, very necessary. I admitted to feeling both encouraged and discouraged by those conversations. I was encouraged because we actually talking about some very deep stuff. I wished we had those conversations years ago. They were discouraging because frankly, it's hard to hear that stuff about yourself and how it affected someone else. Also, I've realized she checked out of the M years ago.
Also during our conversation, I did tell her I would be starting over with just about anybody. She has the advantage that she's the only woman who can love my S the way he deserves to be loved. She got emotional about that one. Not that it was the intent - it was just the truth - just laying it out on the table. During that part of the conversation, she also mentioned the OM was big mistake on her part.
After the first part of the conversation, we did cover the details of the D agreement. We already have a template to work from, but since we're talking, we're trying to work the details among ourselves, and the bring the Ls back in. We're pretty close. There were a couple of items she needed to get back to me on.
