What I'm learning from H stages, myself!

[albamarie]

Last I wrote H had verbalized that he was a 3 yrs old, not sure how or why he came to that age but that's where he said his mind was. Today I see with the 14 hrs+ of video games and the dep getting stronger it's 1991, he was 31 yrs old.

This is the exact point when he was let go from a career that he put his heart and sole into, realizing he was not going to get his start up $$$, we lost the apt. that came with the job, and I was 9 mnths prego w/our fourth child. We moved into an apt. across town just before Christmas, moved schools, one car, and he had no job.

I had never seen him sink so low or see anyone feel so let down by another person before. He ranted angrily, continuously, about how could his boss do that to us. Also, here is were the spiritual battle came in, long story but such a strong blow.

Today, H is spewing the exact words as then, calling old boss by name, playing the exact same video game, growing his hair out again, and staying up 20hrs at a time.

Where do we go from here, well after this there were know other incidences, and life was good, until 2008 pre-bd, when he lost clients, work was slow, and we lost our new build.

Do they replay the actual that made them flip? He's never really let that go, spewing about it all through every stage so far. I think we may have to walk through that one as well, and that's when he will what, flip back, cause there is nowhere left to go from there.

He's coming out slowly, he says he's trying, now the dep is deep again and he's not nice, nor helpful around the house. I'm so scared he's going to come to a point of being a nobody! No change, no heart, just done with life, a complete waste of a man.

That is the time when he was suicidal, what if...I can't take this on, he is too much for me!