I found out yesterday morning that my W did not have a good time the night before. She felt like she was sitting too much, and that I was acting like a single guy and enjoying myself on my own. I didn't know this was happening. She didn't say anything to me, during the evening. I listened to her complaint. She is right that I need to make more of an effort to be a pleasant partner to be with. I get mentally fatigued with learning new material, which isn't a struggle for her. I think there will always be a gap in our learning styles, and chronic conflict due to our different learning styles. It's hard to know what kind of evening she's having, as she doesn't always communicate that to me clearly.
I think my listening worked well enough, as we moved past the conversation and connected during the day thru a shopping trip and dinner. I set some boundaries as she wanted to go dancing that evening, and I was too mentally fatigued for another night of dancing. I need to be mindful of what I say to her in public. If I make a commitment to spend the evening with her, I need to stay in partner mode the entire time.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
