Less lonely, not scared..low on patience

[JBolt]

Thanks for everyone's encouraging words. Saw W very briefly at soccer game as I mixed up the times. She hugged D10 goodbye and looked at me real sad like she always does and said goodbye. The kids and I went bowling later in the afternoon and had a whale of a time.

At 10pm my local time, W sent me the following in an email, the first one sent since mid Oct.

J,
I am ready to file our divorce papers. Can we talk details and then just hire a lawyer to file for us? We can talk face to face or via email will work too.
I am proud that I chose you for my children's father. You are a good man and I hope you find all you want from life and more.
W.

I am weirdly calm about all this. My first thought was to respond with "Knock yourself out", but I refrained. Haven't responded at all actually. Some of this is obviously MLC script. Notice how it's OUR divorce now. I don't think she has the first clue how this will go. However, that doesn't mean she wont' figure it out. She has really and truly convinced herself that it is over between us and this is what has to happen, probably for her own piece of mind.

Part of me is willing to do it, take control and compromise with her to make sure the kids are the number one priority and I am not financially ruined in the process. If we went into mediation now, I can probably get a really good deal as far as spousal support and child support, probably a few hundred dollars less than what I deposit in her account now every month. Sounds heartless, but true. If I contest this and it becomes adversarial, it will only cost both of us more money in the end.

I was telling a friend earlier tonight (close confidant actually dragged into all this after W sent him looking for me at one point to make sure I was ok), she is mentally disturbed. I feel bad about even leaving her like this, though she's gone out of her way to encourage it.

Any advice?

J