Looking for a little advice and support

[azguy]

I was in a similar position with my W a couple years ago. She seemed depressed and unhappy. If she threatened to leave, I would follow that up later by saying I was as well. This does not lead anywhere good.

I'd encourage you to reflect on whether you really want to be in this marriage. If so, commit to not allowing yourself to say or indicate otherwise to the W.

I see a lot of effort on your part to tell her what she is doing wrong (she should go with MIL, not sleep so much). Can you see the situation from her perspective? Can you show her you are trying to be supportive of her, as she goes through this rough time?

You are pinning a lot of hopes on RetroV, and if I had to guess, your disappointment if this does not work out, will lead to further strains on your M.

Start working on you. Maybe you could focus on saying only positive supportive things to your W. Resolve to build her up, not criticize her. Empathize with her.