jp, you're in a difficult place right now and you haven't been at this for long, even tho it seems like forever. Being in a 20 year R isn't something you grieve and get over in 4 months. Stop worry about detaching and just work on it. Sometimes you work on it every minute of every day. NO 2 people will do it the same way or take the same amount of time. Read CoDependent no more, if you haven't already. If you have, read it again.
About your D, you opened Pandora's box.
It seems you have little control, you act on your emotions. It may be those things you need to work on with your IC in order to be strong enough to detach and to be the F your D's deserve.
You got some good ideas on ways to address the situation with your D. Good luck.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
