VG, thanks for the reply. I agree that choice two does make me look better. But, I just feel like with choice #2 I am handing her the gun that will ultimately kill me. I am definitely between a rock and a hard place. It looks like there is really no other choice but #2. There really is no way that I can bring up to her what I am thinking. Not really a good time for a temperature check is it?
M 37 W 36 T22 M14 D8 D4 8/2012 distanced BD 11/2012 (likely wants D. Feelings have changed.) W move out date: June 8th.
You don't think refusing to help get your kids to school in order to try to prevent her from being as able to leave you is not even more so "handing her the gun she'll use to kill you"?
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
I know the feeling. Deep down I want to do the same and ask. All we can do is be patient. Earlier in our sitch I tested these waters and learned.
My sitch is a little different because we are in MC and that is opening up some areas for deeper discussion. My W has said recently (2 days ago) something to the effect of "we don't know what's going to happen to us". So there's nothing for me to ask. I think my W really doesn't know at this point.
Best if you make many small steps in the right direction vs. a giant leap forward only to fall backwards.
VG, I have also asked several weeks ago. My W said " well it looks like I am going to have to choose one way or the other. To either go or stay." That answer and the tone of that answer didn't sound too promising to me. I agree that I don't think she even knows what she is going to do. So frustrating.
M 37 W 36 T22 M14 D8 D4 8/2012 distanced BD 11/2012 (likely wants D. Feelings have changed.) W move out date: June 8th.
Grizz, my guess is that she is on the fence. To do something positive with the kids, even if it makes her life easier, is not going to push her over the fence.
Maybe if you consider what would your decision be in other, more normal, circumstances?
Yes, in more normal circumstances I would change my work schedule and not even think about it.
The coldness hurts. I was holding my girls this morning and W kissed them both said I love you to each one and looked at me and said bye. This isn't really anything different, it just hurts.
M 37 W 36 T22 M14 D8 D4 8/2012 distanced BD 11/2012 (likely wants D. Feelings have changed.) W move out date: June 8th.
