It's good to be here

[Mileus]

Having a terrible day. I don't know why I'm having so much trouble not calling or texting my ex. I know it's a bad idea, I'm just so pissed off that she gets to be happy while I'm at home with 3 kids who are all miserable right now. I love my kids; I just hate the unfairness of it all.

I never saw this coming. We hung out, talked daily, had sex 3-4X per week. I thought things were fine. I know she's been depressed, but I could never get her into counseling or to change her life at all. I know she wanted me to spend more time with her in the garden, but that doesn't excuse the betrayal of 14 years of a good relationship. I know I'll get past all that, just a bad day. And I can't say this to her.

Yesterday, I had to talk to her because of the lawyer paperwork. It turns out that is actually going to be pretty easy. It should be done by next week as long as she signs the custody agreement. She's so cold to me now, like we weren't best friends for 14 years. I understand why, but it [censored] having to pretend I'm doing OK when I just want to yell at her for being so selfish.

Unfortunately, I will have to talk to her again today because she still hasn't signed to form so I can take my son on the cruise in 10 days. She doesn't have a job, it shouldn't be too difficult to do this. And I have to act like I'm not annoyed that she's taking so long. The last 2 times she came down to see the kids, she has taken my daughter places and spent the whole time staring at her watch. My daughter was very annoyed.

She moved an hour away and is creating a whole new life, new kids (his), new friends, etc. I don't feel like she'll ever regret her decision. Thanks for letting me vent.