I've told the kids they don't have to continue to talk to him if he gets abusive.
S14 is OK with this and follows through, but D17 wants to argue and 'set him right'. I've provided a good role model over the years for this!
The issue of professional help is problematic. OW (ex family friend) masquerades as a therapist, and so kids don't trust anyone taking this role. They are very resistant to the idea.
