Time For Me (Part 2)

[Spartan]

Forgot to post what I originally came here to post...

So last night I told kids I got us tickets for Monster Truck Show (yeehaw!!!) and they were more excited than I thought they would be. D7 wanted to see tickets and saw only 3 and then things turned... She ran to basement to 'hide' which was last thing I expected. She's such a smart girl and she knew right away what it meant. I went down there and she looked at me and her lip started quivering and she started asking where mom's ticket was. I told her I wanted to go just the 3 of us. She got mad and said she wanted mom to go as a family and wondered why she can't come with us. I put her on my lap and explained to her that we would be doing more things with just the 3 of us. She started to push me away and asked why we still wanted a D because we have so much fun together. Talk about heart break city! I stayed strong and explained that I agreed we were having fun and that doesn't have to stop. I told her that we both love her very much but things will start being different. I told her I understood how she felt and it's ok to be mad and or sad but I made sure she knew she could talk with me about anything. She relaxed and gave me a hug. I told her we could think about the show for the next couple days and not go if she didn't want to. She said we can go and it will be fun. She then asked if we can make a sign for girl driver that shoots glitter from truck (I have no idea what she's talking about so need to google this). She then asked a few more questions about the future and I answered them without discussing W at all. At end when she said she didn't want us to get a D I did say that it wasn't what I wanted either but it's where we are right now and that I loved her and her brother. She said "I know" and gave me a HUGE, long hug. She was calmed down then and we worked on her science fair project for next hour laughing a bunch. She even invited her brother down to help glue things

I've been expecting W start to really show anger over new direction and I'm sure she will but I didn't really think about it hitting kids this quickly. My D7 is so smart and observant, probably more then I am . I'm just so glad that we have the relationship we have where she feels safe to talk, ask her questions, and show emotion to me. I was also reminded by my friend that this wasn't my choice and my motives for doing this to protect me and kids are pure.

Lesson here though is if we think false hope effects us we need to remember the kids. They don't have these boards, the life experiences, or (hopefully) don't see the negatives in our M's, all they see are the fun family times and they can easily start to believe everything is ok again... I'm more glad then ever for the advice I received because I need to start preparing not only myself but my kids for what is a very real potential to happen.