I still think their relationship wont work out. She doesnt want to leave our house or get a job. Thd trust factor is going to be impossible for OM as long as she lives with me.
Maybe I'm misreading when you say stuff like this so let me just ask you, do you think that if you wait long enough she'll just get tired of OM and come back to you to reconcile? I definitely agree with you that the A is not going to last. It'll bomb at some point. But I'm not sure she'll see you as the better option so much as go seek out a different OM.
I just don't get the impression that you are doing anything different. You've talked a lot about what GAL activities you're going to start some day, but I haven't seen you talk about any that you've started or are actively involved in. 99% of your posts are all about analyizing and scrutinizing your W's every move- what it means, how it compares to historical data, where it puts her on the timeline, etc. etc. etc. I don't know for sure, but I suspect this is "more of the same" behavior for you, you were probably like this in the M. Michele talks about in DR how we are creatures of habit, and how we insist that we've "tried everything" but that if we really take a hard, unbiased look at what we are doing we discover that we're really doing the same old thing over and over again but giving it a different name or changing it only slightly to convince ourselves it's something different. All that does is frustrate us because we don't understand why it doesn't work. It doesn't work because it is MORE OF THE SAME!!!!
After all this time I think you are still engaging in more of the same behavior. I've offered you this challenge before, but here it is again: how about you just quit posting here for a while- a few days, maybe a week; and take that time to actually do something to get a life? Take that first step!! Quit obsessing over this! Detach! Give it a try, you will be surprised to find how much it helps. And then you'll know why we keep telling you that you have to do this to heal yourself and maybe your M.
