But you were fixing things. Maybe you've been able to fix situations and make it better. Remember that this is about her feelings and needing reassurance that you support her.
I think most men see themselves as fixers.
My personal frustration with venting to my H was he would often tell me what I needed to do, or should have done. He usually came across as sounded critical of me. I would leave the discussion feeling worse.....and alone. Maybe I wanted him to just agree and tell me I was right, but if so, it was my way of wanting reassurance he was on my side.
I would suggest that you stop seeing yourself in the light of a fixer. I'm not saying you do this, but I've read several post from newcomers who sound rather proud to announce they are fixers. Truth is, that title (or talent) was a hindrance in the MR b/c it hinted at being an excuse to go against what was advised......like stepping back, don't bring up R talk, don't try to fix your W, etc.
I hope I've helped in some small way. I know it's hard to understand the opposite sex, b/c they are just that......opposite from us.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
