Here we go loopty loo. Here we go loopty li.

[albamarie]

[b]There is a theory that they do sometimes indeed want to get caught, to have someone else "make" them change, because they can't do it themselves, at least easily, OR to prove how "bad" they are and should be tossed aside so they can continue their self-destruction....this is where the patience from us is required, to NOT be the one to force them, but to let them figure it out, and do the hard work, themselves...man, it is difficult, yes?

TS - is this when an ea can be worse, it's like she's been given the power to expose his doings, without consequences, she can do no wrong when exposing him, its like he needs that. What if he tries to balance the bad behavior with coming to me for confirmation that he is really good? He has to figure it out for himself , but do I engage in giving the light he's seeking?


Having a spirit of forgiveness and compassion towards H has been keeping me strong. I think I would completely crumble if I wasn't trying my best to be understanding and trying not to focus on how I have been wronged. This experience has made me more compassionate not only towards him, but others. I don't know if I will ever have a relationship with H again, but I feel like I am being put through the fire, and I'm becoming a better person for it.[/b]

Raine - your words mirror my thoughts exactly, if I took any other path than this I would not have made it this far without destroying myself! We cannot let them bring us down with them. Like everyone says we're on our own journey as well, keep up the good thoughts, I enjoy reading how your handling these trying days!

Best dm