Compliments & Passive Aggressiveness..Work to do!

[cat04]

First of all, there is no "magic timeframe" for A's to end. Most research shows that they last from 6 months to 2 years. However, just like any other relationship, that is dependent on the R and other circumstances.

I also know of several long term marriages that started out as A's. And they are happy marriages, so while I don't want to burst your bubble, I would like you to realize that it is possible...

Look, it didn't take just one flirty line from OM to get your W interested, because she was already vulnerable.

She was vulnerable because of issues in the M, that you may or may not have been aware of.

There was a lack of emotional intimacy, a lack of sexual intimacy...

I think I understand why Laurie says to go ahead and text with your W. She is hoping to maintain the friendship and possibly renew the interest...

The thing I would like you to be aware of here...

It doesn't mean ROMANTIC interest and honestly it doesn't necessarily mean that her interest in OM is waning...

There are times, when my BF is watching something on television that I am not interested in or is working on a project that I have no part of...

What do I do with my time?

I crochet, surf the internet, sometimes, I text or have a phone conversation with someone else. That doesn't mean that I am NOT interested in my BF or that I am intersted in someone else... It means that I am doing something with my time...

You are spending too much time analzying every little thing....

You said that for you, there is one "correct" answer to things...

In math, that is true. In life, it is not...

While there are answers that we WANT to be the correct answer, that doesn't make it correct for everyone.

STOP, BREATHE, and stop looking for the magic pill, magic time frame, or the ONE thing that is going to change this, because there isn't one.

IF change happens, it will be for a combination of reasons, some of which you won't even understand...

I think I can also understand why Laurie advised you to stop posting a bit (as you have revealed more of the conversation, which makes the comments seem much less offensive to posters here)...

YOU get yourself confused and turned all inside out when you have too much information to process.

You need to focus and you too easily manage to get your focus all twisted up by posting, questioning, explaining, justifying and snooping.

Just my thoughts...