Gonna be different now, (butterfly in hurricane).

[theUF]

Metaphorically speaking, you're in really rough air Bruce and you sir are grasping onto your risers hoping it will sort it self out. Comforting? Sure, but also immensly counterproductive. Man up, let go of your risers and control the toggles, go through the motions or the reality stick will smack YOU across the face.

You take no responsibilty. Stop blaming your W, stop blaming your "ill-tounged" in-laws and stop blaming your S.

Oh, I'm an idiot,
I've blown it, the only support I had in this tough times.
Everything I do in life seems to fail

And, enough with the self pity martyrdom. Just another way of saying "oh well I guess I just can't succeed. No point in putting more effort into it"
Just like you said "oh well" about your S not taking a nap. Instead of shrugging you shoulders, why not ask your W for advice?

You seem to think that others ill behaviour justifies YOUR ill behaviour, it does NOT. Stop wasting energy on that d**ned scoreboard, and take responsibility of your own behaviour. Let others worry about theirs.

Think about what a MAN would do.
Would a MAN sob about his in laws talking with a tone?
Sob about providing for his S?
Sob about everything in life working against him?

No one has promised you days without pain, or a life without hard times. You are the one who decide wether you give up or accept the fact. If you accept that fact you can do something about it. At least then you have a good chance of getting your life back on track. If you curl up and sob, nothing good will come of it.

Everyone is being rough b/c you refuse to see the facts of life, not b/c they want you any harm.