Oh, I'm an idiot, I've blown it, the only support I had in this tough times. Everything I do in life seems to fail, oh my, I'm in such a bad crisis right now. I have cognitive dissonance (say things the opposite of what I feel), and anger that I can't seem to be able to control. I publicly apologize for the "bah bah" comment, I'm just not gifted for playing with babies. Sorry again for such insensitivity. I feel like, I don't know, maybe going to Australia and pretending all this never happened, it's a nightmare that seems to have no end. My worse nightmare. I want out.
Quote:
Asking a mother to trust someone else with her son's well-being, when there is no historical reference to prove that person is trustworthy with the child is incredibly unfair.
Well, aren't moms trusted with 3 days old infants when they get out of the hospital? Nobody asks them to prove that they will be good moms or if they did it before. Why would W need to test or trial me before? Besides he's a toddler now. Is asking a little faith in me from her too much?
And we really had a good time together with S. I changed his diaper twice, I fed him, we played in the park, tried to put him to sleep, sang to him, rocked him, I cleaned his nose 1000 times, I carried him back and forth to McDo, to supermarket and back. You can reproach my having no experience, but not my goodwill. I am trying, I am trying.
