I can sympathize with your sitch - I've tried to 'fix' the R with my W and kids several times. The one thing I found out, and the hard way, is that it's not possible. They have to be willing to do the work necessary to repair the rift themselves.
Sure, I was able to smooth a few wrinkles, but, my W and kids had to do the grunt work, when they were ready, while I watched from the sidelines (with encouragement, of course).
I'm probably stating the obvious here, but, your S slapping the olive branch your H is extending is most likely his way of punishing your H for the way he's acted. D23 did this many times to my W. For a while, D23 stated she didn't want her mother at the hospital when she went into labor because of how she had been acting.
At some point my W began to understand how her actions affected the whole family and her R with all of us - it wasn't just about her and I. But, nothing I said or did was able to make her understand that. At some point, your H will have to come to that understanding as well if he wants to have a R with his son.
From my experience, all you can really do is provide the options and make him choose. Others may have better advice, YMMV...
