Is it humanly possible to drop the rope?

[AntoniaB]

Thank you Beatrice. First of all, that whole "I am sure Mr. Right is waiting for you" or the "Congrats you're in a relationship" response on fb. are the reasons I don't feel I will ever post anything about my relationship status on fb. I am listed as single because you have to put something, but I am not comfortable with the comments people right, like the one you mention, which does imply you are somehow lacking and need to just have hope some day the right guy will come along (and what if he doesnt', should you consider your life as lesser, I don't think so) or the other type of comments I see when people put that they ARE in a relationship. Things like "about time!" or "Oh I'm so glad you deserve this!!!" Those things just bug me and I know I'm in the minority about that but I know you agree with me.

Maybe this is the issue with this man I'm friends with, that I just don't see what is going to be BETTER about my life if I get into a relationship with this person. I enjoy him as a friend, but do I really want to sacrifice time with my other friends, time for myself doing things I enjoy alone, a million other things? I guess the answer is no for now.

I do think there is an expectation, primarily for women, that we be coupled up. Were it right after my divorce, then no, but I do think a fair amount of people think I "should" be in a relationship by now, and I feel like I spend a lot of time defending my choice to remain single because 90% of the time I am very happy and thriving in this lifestyle in a lot of ways. The only people I don't feel I have to defend it to are a few friends who "get it" (most are the single ones) and my immediate family.

You know what it reminds me of? The days in my 30s when I was constantly told "You would make a great mom, you should have kids" when I was choosing not to. I just don't feel men get these kinds of things said to them as much as women and it gets on my nerves.