I think there is a difference between a WAS and a MLCer. I would compare a MLC person to an addicit that needs to hit bottom and a WAS who is more a person that is not having their needs met in a relationship.
For most of us it is a combination of both aspects. I know that in my ditch their were many things I needed to change about be. But ultimately my sitch would have happened regardless of whether or not I was the perfect wife because my h is so unhappy with himself.
If you click on my name where it's highlighted in red you can choose posts that I have created
---- M 39 H 35 D5,D4 M 4 T 9 ILYBNILWY 5/18/11 Left 7/11/11 Divorced 12/1/13