Thank you, Advina, for putting all of that into such a great perspective. I alwasy worry about what people think and making others amd - I'm a fixer - and yes, it makes it all more confusing and painful. So when I intiated less contact, etc that wa part of the point, to make it less painful to me, but also so he knew that the situation was not ok as it was. But how do you get from beginning to end - at some point do we not have to become friends and almost 'date'again in order to get back together? It's not like he is going to decide to move back home one day. And mebeing distant and probably coming across 'cold', which is 'more of the same' from the beginning of our marriage (according to him) doesn't seem the path to get us there. Know what I mean?
Like you, I also have lots of internal work to do - some of it I have no idea how to start into - but I have started a list. I typed it all in word and am trying to copy over with no success. Might have to wait til I get home to post it. (it's a little long!)
