Gonna be different now, (butterfly in hurricane).

[Big Bruce]

Alright, you've convinced me.
I'm going for counselling with a different counsellor next week or the week after.
I have too much anger at the moment, and when I think of W, I have a knot in the stomach. This can'T be good.

I don't get it, how life got me here. When I look outside and it's -20C, and I think it's not so bad today, something went wrong.

So, I called my L, and explained not so calmnly that W refused to drop or pick up S. And what we could now. Awaiting for his answer.

I also replied to W, saying that if she didn't want to make good to me for the time she taking S out of my visitation schedule, I wouldn't argue but it denoted her unability to cooperate. (Maybe I shouldn't have been "accusing").
I also said it didn't have to be always confrontational, and since we'Re allowed to change the court order by mutual agreement it implied communication, good faith and collaboration. (try to appeal to her good side...)

Of course I'll pay what I owe, and every month what I was ordered to. But in my head it's like written permission to leave me.
Unconsciously she thinks, it's awesome, I kick H out, and get paid to do it.
I don't know, maybe it's over simplicistic, but I get money as a reward for work, not for crap I do. And to me, leaving your spouse is wrong.

Anyways, I'll see what the counsellor says, I don't recognize myself these past few days. I don't know if C will be able to salvage anything in me now.

Bonsoir,
B.