Still Confused Beyond Belief...part 2

[adinva]

For me, I picked my worthless humiliated self up and started a meetup group to meet complete strangers who were interested in playing guitar and singing together, and have improved tremendously and gained confidence doing something I never would have imagined myself doing before, singing for other people. Those people don't even know I've been left, don't know and it's not who I am to them. To them I'm interesting and fun and a good organizer.

I joined another meetup group to get to know fellow hikers and in the warmer months I'm going backpacking. I tried it for the first time last summer.

I learned how to ski in the face of my entire family telling me I'm not coordinated enough and will look foolish.

I had given up my connection to my college, which used to be a big part of my identity, because it's not as impressive as H's Ivy League alma mater. So when a sticker came in the mail for me to make a donation to the alumni association, I stuck that sticker on my car window. A very small thing, but to me, it's like I'm coming out of a shell I've been in for 20 years.

I've taken my kids on two cruises and taken them to beaches and adventure trips, ALL BY MYSELF.

I need to get back to basics and reread DR, so please don't take me as presenting myself as a great role model, but I had a very healthy self image to start with, and found a bazillion things I would like to do to really be me more overtly and more intentionally, to express that I love adventure and travel and music and I'm not just a single mom and I'm not just a wife who got left because she wasn't good enough at housework.

That's what I meant by reinventing.