That's alright, LIS. I'm back to not spending a lot of time here again, either. It's hard to move forward if you keep looking back, ya know? Too much drudging up of the pain and re-opening wounds and it slows my healing.
H and I haven't had much interaction, but have still managed to have a few spats. We had a short discussion about them last night. He suggested that I should go see his counselor so that I could work on my coping skills, to be able to deal better with my disappointments in him. So I suggested that we could both just focus on coping and forgiving and accepting the other person for what/how they are. And he said sure, as long as we still have sex and do things together and act like a happily-married couple. So in other words, he's suggesting that *I* learn to cope, forgive and accept my disappointments in him, but *I* also give him everything he wants so that he doesn't have any real disappointments to have to cope with. This really is crazy-making. But it's also strange, because I'm starting to feel like an outside observer. Weird.
LIS, should you be talking to your H? I know you said you're not "mean" like that, but his chasing after you can't be good for you. Did he engage with you when you were home? Or does he only react like this when you leave? Especially as you get away and can see the "dark place" behind you, it seems like you would do well to not tempt yourself. And even if your H needs help with treatment, I'm not sure you have to go back to him in order to offer that. I guess in a way I envy where you're at, like you've scaled the fence and now you can be free -- if you just keep going.
